CURIOUS CHICKENS

Great show yesterday kid.
A great show which solved the age old question,
Why did the chicken cross the road? Tommy my cat and I were shocked, amazed, and greatly perplexed to find it was all down to our old friend, good old fashioned curiosity.
Tommy jumped off his little pink,Triang tricycle and said, "For more years than I care to remember,I have studied the various emotions a chicken can display on its face. I have seen, hate, love, sadness, lust, envy,awful,awful envy, greed, exasperation and petulance, but I have NEVER seen a chicken display even an iota of curiosity on its visage."
"Which is why chickens make such good poker players," I said.
"All over the world,gambling casinos bar chickens from playing any game of chance."
"The things you learn," muttered Tommy,"when you talk to a premier head-banger."
Tommy delicately picked up the latest copy of "HEAT" magazine, crossed one scrawny leg languidly over the other and said,
"According to this article by Martha Carney, John Wayne walked the way he did because of baby rash. CHRONIC,INCURABLE,baby rash," roared Tommy, "that increased in severity and intensity as the years went by!"
I threw the heel of a pan loaf like a Frisbee at my latest ginger-haired hostage and screamed,
"And yet, knowing that, John Marion Wayne goes and picks a career that involves lots of horse riding!"
"Don't get on to me!" roared Tommy."Take it up with Martha Carney."
"I will!" I yelled. "When I'm on Newsnight Review giving a critique on the charcoal drawings and brass monkey rubbings of Steven Nolan."
"Tubby Nolan can kiss my ass!" yelled Tommy.
"Thank you Tommy!" boomed Tubby and the oval one stuck his massive head in the window and kissed Tommy on the bum.
"UGH!" shrieked Tommy. "I'll never be able to look at my rear in the face again."
While Tommy ran for the scrubbing brush and Lifebuoy soap, the rotund,
un-debonair, debauchee ran away as fast as his little,fat legs would carry him.
Any man who would kiss a cat's ass, has NO boundaries,which is why, I have no hesitation in naming Tubby Nolan, BOUNDER OF THE WEEK!