Beware The Hucklebuck

Great show yesterday kid.
It's good to know one can still get back into the country by flashing an Iranian passport. All your callers yesterday gave every indication they were taking their medication religiously. All but one that is. I speak of course of the last caller who,it seemed, did not have a stop button. As he babbled on and on, Tommy my cat lay behind the sofa with a 1916, German World War one 3 inch, FK96 Krupp,Feldkanone howitzer pointing at his head.
"MAKE HIM STOP!" yelled Tommy. "In the name of all that's sacred, holy and Divine, MAKE HIM STOP!"
"Put down that piece of light artillery," I yelled,"and have some compassion for your fellow man! That none-stopping,talking man may be a Trappist monk with a dispensation from the Pope to talk for one day only."
"Papal Bull!" roared Tommy,picking up a piece of chalk and drawing a line under the subject.
I looked at my prized painting of Henry The Eighth eating a suckling pig and said,
"That royal picture is old hat. Take it out and replace it with this lovely picture of Prince William and Kate Middleton walking hand in hand down the Mall carrying two jam jars of tadpoles."
When Tommy took the back off the picture he gave a shriek and yelled,
"Hey, there's a song written here in very olde, English script!"
"Sing it,Tommy!" I yelled. "Nail it and make it your own."
"I'll do my best," said Tommy."It's very difficult to read, but here goes.
Here's a minuet you should know--HEY!
When the candles are down low-HEY!
Grab your strumpet and then go."
TOMMY!!!" I screamed."Put the song down and back away.It's the dreaded Hucklebuck!
Had you sung all of that song, you and I would be going to George Jones' Show band revivals for the rest of our lives."
Tommy and I were put up in a school until men wearing anti-Hucklebuck suits came and took the song away.
Should you come on a copy of the Hucklebuck, get out, stay out and get the elite anti-Hucklebuck squad-OUT!