To sleep perchance to dream.

Great show yesterday Kid. When doctor Zhivago, or Mr Coyle as he is known to the staff of early morning Casualty, went into his never-ending Russian dream story,
the temperature in my home dropped. It began to snow and icicles hung from the window. Tommy my cat looked at me and said,
"Comrade, we have no bread."
I looked out the window. All was rubble and devastation. (Had the cease fire broken down?) NO, it was Stalingrad. Jim Rodgers went by on a Russian motorcycle and screamed,
"NIGH! NIGH! NIGH! Comrade, NIGH! is the Winter of our discontent. The people have no bread and are eating the dead horses. Tubby Nolan was seen running home with a hobby horse on his back."
"Comrade Rodgers," I yelled, "we will fight to the last man for mother Russia."
"Are you off your bap?" screamed Jim. "What we need here in Russia, is one man one vote."
"Good luck with that," I muttered, as I turned away from the window.
When Mr Coyle finished the great Russian dream saga Tommy landed at my side with a hop, skip and jump and said,
"That dream of Mr Coyle, Eh? Know what I mean? Say no more. Say no more. That dream of Mr Coyle. Did you notice anything odd about it? Eh? Say no more. Know what I mean? Eh? Eh? Nudge, nudge. Wink-wink."
I fired a World War Two shell through the ceiling, just to see if the mortar was working, (You get some dodgy stuff on ebay) and said,
"What are you getting at Tommy cat? Come on. Spit it out. Don't stand there like Fagin nodding and leering."
"In Mr Coyle's dream," said Tommy, "and remember Mr Coyle was asleep when he had the dream, there came a point in the story when Mr Coyle went to sleep standing behind Gerry."
"I see nothing strange in that," I said. "You must remember that Mr Coyle was very tired, waiting for Gerry to get his book, so Mr Coyle went to sleep! What's so odd about that!"
"Don't you SEE?" yelled Tommy. "Mr Coyle was already asleep. How could he go to sleep AGAIN in a dream?"
"By the sacred, green, boxer shorts of Mark Durkin," I yelled, "that stands reality on its head. Mr Coyle has taken us into the Twilight Zone."
"Come 'ere," said Tommy. "There's more." We have established that Mr Coyle went to sleep in a dream, which means that Mr Coyle went to sleep twice, once in reality and once in the dream. What we are talking of here, is sleep within-sleep."
"Don't Tommy!" I yelled. "STOP, you're scaring me. I have lost all sense of reality. Could we be in a dream now?"
"Who knows," said Tommy. "And who ain't talking. But come 'ere, there's still more. Mr Coyle is in his bed in Derry. Mr Coyle goes to sleep and dreams he is in Russia. In the dream Mr Coyle goes to sleep, but my question is, did Mr Coyle dream in the second sleep, the Russian dream sleep. Because if he did, not only would we have sleep within sleep but also a dream within a dream."
"ITS THE RUSSIAN DOLLS!" I screamed. "Every time you open a Russian doll you find a smaller doll and so on and so on,ad infinitum!"
Then a strange, weird thing happened. The radio came on by itself and Roy Orbison began to sing,
"In dreams I walk with you. In dreams I talk with you. But it's only in-dreams."
If you were passed on the fast lane on the M1 yesterday by a running woman and cat. It was Tommy and I. Many people flashed the lights at-ME! Why can Mr Coyle not go to sleep and just lie there, like the rest of us do??
Answers on a postcard to Lynda Byrons, UTV L-I-V-E.