10 Lost Days

"APRIL FOOL!" yelled Tommy my cat as he detonated a large, burgundy, Russian landmine under my bed while I was asleep.
Oh,I was angry. I was so angry I was spitting feathers.
"Who gave you a key to the armoury?" I yelled.
"RASPUTIN!" laughed Tommy.
"Rasputin the mad, monk wino, who in reality is Derek Daisy from Ballymena."
"So the reality is, Derek Daisy from Ballymena?" I said.
"That's what the reality is!" replied Tommy.
Tommy slipped into a skintight, mint-green leotard and said,
"How did all this, April Fool business come about? Come on, spit it out.Don't stand there like a Daniel O'Donnell fan at a Black Sabbath Concert."
I sat down on a maritime, marlin spike and said,
"Come with me to France. The year is 1582. Up until now New Years Day was April the first. Enter stage left Pope Greg with a calender under his arm. There was a lovely picture of Walter Love on the front of the calender.
The Pope addressed the assembled rabble,
"Les Miserables," roared Greg,"the times they are a changing.
The Julian calender is kaput. Under my oxter I have the new calender, the Gregorian calender!"
"Good on yeh, yeh boy!" cried a French peasant.
"Put your clocks back ten days!" roared Greg.
"That means you will all get a good lie in."
"Good old Greg!" roared the crowd.
"And another thing," bellowed Greg,"any one who fails to follow my Papal Bull is a FOOL!"
Pope Greg made that speech on the 1st of April 1582, hence-April Fool."
"I still don't get it," muttered Tommy,as he set off for Tubby Nolan's house pulling a large field gun behind him. As little Tommy walked along he kept a sharp look out for the ten lost days.
And so should YOU!
Just think what you could do with 10 days in Spain!