Building Bridges

Great shows this week kid. Where do great shows come from? Do you have an in house "Think Tank" at Radio Foyle? Who came up with the brilliant idea to supply you with sub standard audio equipment? Who decided that Jordie Tuft should be the agony uncle at Radio Foyle? And what a master stroke it was to unleash Mr Coyle on an unsuspecting public. Mr Coyle is an example to all young hoods, who wasted their lives throwing stones at the army. Sure, he has a police record. But many people have a copy of, "Every breath I take."
I looked at Tommy my cat who was playing Belgian bagatelle with Taffy Tumbler. Taffy is quite famous in Belfast. Measuring five foot six inches in his pantyhose, Taffy claims to be the world's tallest dwarf. And I, as a mere head-banger can see no reason as to why that claim should be disputed.
"Better run along home now little fellow," I said to Taffy. "The insurance man has just come out of your house. Your mummy will soon open a tin of something and hand you a spoon."
"I hope it's not another tin of Roncall varnish," said the ungrateful little tyke.
Why is it that little people always seem to have a chip on their shoulder?
Using my hands, I picked up two clocks from the mantelpiece, handed one to Tommy and said,
"Well, Tommy lad, now that we find ourselves with time on our hands, what shall we do? Tommy did not disappoint.
Ten minutes later Tommy and I were in the garden, engaging in fierce, synchronized, projectile vomiting after eating vast quanties of Saxa salt.
Why, Why, Why is synchronized vomiting not included in the Olympic Games? It would produce many gold medals for Northern Ireland!
"And now we have Paddy Murphy and Sammy Smith boking their guts out in London. And both sections of the community in Nor'n Iron are cheering them on!"
BOKING! The best way to build bridges!