Electricity Poles and Headless Horsemen

Great show to start the post election week Kid. Beware of the knavish Mr Coyle. The bastion of law and order is trying to undermine your confidence by insinuating you are putting on weight. Mr Coyle is trying to give you a Tubby Nolan complex and send you on an eating splurge that would shame Billy Bunter.Is there nothing the Machiavellian Thaddeaus will not stoop to in his effort to oust you from your seat? Reference is made to Mr Coyle in the book of Revelations.
"Beware the dark one with the one hirsute eye brow. His treachery and corner boy shenanigans will make countless thousands mourn."
During the show Tommy my cat was shaken out of his nonchalant,devil may car attitude by the news that the street lights in Gilford are ablaze 24 hours a day.
"By the star spangled, tattered, grey Y-fronts of Les Dennis!" yelled Tommy.
"Do the people of Gilford think that electricity grows on trees?"
I giggled, gurgled and smirked,
"Of course electricity does not grow on trees. Electricity grows on poles,electric poles."
The riser Tommy gave me was painful to the point of Marquis De-Sade erotic pleasure.
I leaped on the shoulders of a passing, stooped, old aged pensioner and yelled,
"Blame not the people of Gilford. Blame rather the horseman,the terrible, headless horseman,who gallops through the sleepy hollow that is Guilford,cutting off noggins like a mad, headless thing."
"I RELENT!" yelled Tommy. "Let the lights of Gilford blaze out! My message to the people of Gilford is, "Keep your heads and DON'T switch off the street lights."
Suddenly a thought hit me. I gave a dog-like yelp and cried,
"Could the headless horseman be-Tubby Nolan?"
"NO!" cried Tommy. "Tubby has head in abundance. Tubby Nolan's head is on a par with the statues on Easter Island. If Tubby were a horseman,he would be the neckless horseman."
"Tommy!" I cried. "You are indeed the Steven Hawkin of the feline world."
"I may be," said Tommy,"but I won't let it go to my-head."
Oh how we laughed at the impromptu Oscar Wilde quip.