TITANIC OVERLOAD. It's all too much!!

Great show to start the week kid. A great show,greatly appreciated by nursing mothers and those with a penchant for cheap, costume jewellery.
Tommy my cat, my life long friend, and three-legged, race partner looked at me and said, "Would it not be ironic in the extreme if the MS Balmoral cruise ship, which is following in the path of the Titanic 100 years ago, were to hit an iceberg and sink?" I stood there speechless. When I found my voice I yelled, "What kind of deranged, twisted, evil mind do you have? Do you want to see a great catastrophe repeated? You are one sick cat. You are vileness personified.
You're the devil in disguise. Only a cat with no feelings could come out with a statement like that! What came over you to conjure up such a wicked, sick, unthinkable scenario?"
Tommy fell on the floor, kicked madly with his legs, beat his fists into the carpet and screamed,
"I can't take anymore! I can't take anymore-Titanic! I am Titaniced up to the gunnels.I can't take it anymore!"
I drew the curtains, lowered my voice and said,
"You think you'rE the only one? You think you'rE the only one? There are people all over Ulster, hoping, praying, that some day the BBC will not mention the word-Titanic. You must be strong. This too shall pass. Remember, way back in the mists of time when Northern Ireland nil scored a goal. Remember how long that celebration lasted: Street parties, Special songs and the lavish banquet at Spence's fish and chip shop. You must be strong. Grit your teeth, gird your loins and let the BBC throw as much Titanic at you as they want too."
"I'll try," said Tommy, drying his eyes. I turned on the radio just in time to hear some hystericAA screaming, "Breaking News! It has just been reported that the M1 is to be renamed, The Titanic Highway." Tommy and I leaped into the coal bunker and shut the lid with a slam.